So you are contemplating divorce. Your mind is filled with worry and stress over whether or not this is the right course of action for the new year. In fact, you have so many things on your mind you are reaching out to any resource to answer those questions you have. As with any divorce or potential divorce, the Family Law Attorneys at the Brandy Austin Law Firm have the ability and know-how to guide you through the difficult process we call divorce. Divorce is life changing. Preparation is key to getting through a divorce intact. Tempering emotions and working amicably will ease the emotional and financial burden a divorce can bring.
“Leave your emotions at the door.” I often tell potential clients this whenever they come in for a Family Law consultation. Decisions based on an angry emotional response almost always never end well. Sure it is easier said than done, but keeping emotions in check during the entire divorce process is not only a necessity but a requirement. The potential for ending things amicably may be delayed because you are so angry that you refuse to settle. I have seen clients willing to fight over the most trivial matters not out of want or need but out of anger. If you are considering divorce, you must realize that you must stay focused and calm.
Imagine with me for a moment. There was a time when everything seemed to be just so perfect. Your mind was filled with excitement, joy and anticipation of what was to come. The engagement, the wedding, the honeymoon all resulted in your dream come true. Do you remember that feeling? Think about that feeling as you read this blog entry. Below are a few points one should consider when considering a divorce.
- a. Counseling – Have you given the marriage your all? Have you seriously looked at your role in the difficulties? Sometimes we need an outside neutral party to help guide us through the marriage. A good marriage counselor may be able to save the marriage by guiding you to root cause of the problem and helping you find a solution.
- b. Children – Children are of the utmost importance during a divorce. The question you should ask yourself if you have children is “How will this decision affect my children?” Every decision you make must be in the best interest of the children.
- c. Expenses – Costs during a divorce will vary depending on your situation. The financial impact of a divorce can increase immensely if both you and your spouse fight over every little thing. Living expenses may increase do to having two separate homes. Attorney fees may increase if the divorce is high conflict.
- d. Finances – Budgeting is essential during a divorce. The extra income you had from your spouse is no longer present. Budgeting for every day expenses is equally as important as budgeting for your divorce. Poorly made emotional decisions can have long term consequences during your divorce. If you can no longer pay your Family Law Attorney who has worked diligently on your case, you may lose a powerful advocate on your behalf.
- e. Family – Everyone is affected during a divorce. In an ideal world, no one would take sides and everyone would work together to help both spouses navigate the divorce with as little friction as possible. Having family to support you during a divorce will help lessen the emotional turmoil of a divorce. However, keep in mind that you are the one who will make the ultimate decision in how your divorce is handled. Do not let your family talk you into making a poor emotional decision.
Do you really want to get a divorce?
I cannot recall how many times clients have come in asking for the Brandy Austin Law Firm to file for divorce only to change their minds half-way through the process. Often, many just go through the motions of getting a divorce. I can recall a former client who after getting the divorce granted wished she had never filed. She held out hope that her husband would ask her to stop the divorce but he never did. It was only after the divorce that she realized what she wanted was not a divorce but a better marriage. Choosing to get a divorce is no easy task, getting through a divorce is even harder. If you are truly seeking a divorce or want a free consultation about divorce, please contact a qualified Family Law Attorney from the Brandy Austin Law Firm.